Dealing With Loss

In my senior year of high school, I had a great English teacher. And even though I only had her for that one year, she’d made such an impact on my life. She gave me advice, I hung out in her classroom after school sometimes; she was great. But on Christmas night, I learned that she passed away from stage-four cancer. I think it was lung cancer, but I’m not 100% positive. It hit me really hard. The last time I’d seen her, she was at my graduation and she’d told me that she was proud of me. Her death took me by surprise. She hadn’t mentioned the cancer to us and my heart is still broken from it. I’m not crying constantly anymore, but it doesn’t seem right. You know, there are those people when they pass, you’re reaction is cry but say, “They had it coming, they were really old,” something along those lines. But she wasn’t that old. And to me, her life ended so abruptly, it just doesn’t seem real. Even though I’ve read her obituary, it’s still unreal to me. She was a great teacher and advice-giver. She was just a great person. And now that she’s gone, it just hurts to know that I won’t see her at my high school reunion or anything. We all deal with loss in various ways. I cry and write and sing sometimes. Others drink themselves away, others get depressed, other lash out. But whatever you do, do it safely. Be healthy. It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to be mad and question the world for a bit. But after all of it is over, just breathe and realize you’re okay. Maybe not fully, but you’re here. And that’s always a plus.